August 11, 2005
HE MUST HATE HELEN THOMAS
Woodward offers insight on Bush, Nixon, politics (Catherine Lutz, Aspen Times, 8/10/05)
Woodward's half-hour talk, punctuated several times by well-received jokes, was followed by 11 questions from the audience. He theorized that Hillary Clinton would earn the Democratic nomination in 2008 and would run against Dick Cheney, and he rejected the likelihood of a third party being a threat to Democrats and Republicans. He discounted the fear that Supreme Court nominee John Roberts would help overturn abortion rights if elected to the bench.Enough with the jokes, what were the questions? Posted by David Cohen at August 11, 2005 8:29 AM
Hillary Clinton, John Roberts, and a Third Party walk into a bar...
Posted by: Matt Murphy at August 11, 2005 9:08 AM... and the bartender says, what do you want? and Hillary says, have you seen my husband ...
Posted by: AllenS at August 11, 2005 9:14 AMAnd the bartender says, "I just saw him enter a back room with another woman, and isn't that a blow below the belt!"
Posted by: at August 11, 2005 9:27 AM... and Hillary says, I need a lawyer, and John Roberts says, don't look at me ...
Posted by: AllenS at August 11, 2005 9:32 AMThen the bartender says, "I'll be your lawyer: I have just as much legal understanding as an average liberal judge."
Posted by: Matt Murphy at August 11, 2005 9:48 AMSuddenly, the Third Party pounds its shot of Jaeger, slams the glass on the bar and yells [Dean Crazy Train] "Yeeeaaaaauuuggggggggghhhhhhhh!!!"[/Dean Crazy Train]
Posted by: John Resnick at August 11, 2005 10:18 AM...and John Roberts says "Check please."
Posted by: Matt Murphy at August 11, 2005 10:28 AMBut not before Bill sticks his head out of the doorway and says, "Now, Hill baby, I'll be home soon. Don't, uh, blow the election".
Posted by: jim hamlen at August 11, 2005 11:29 AMWell, it appears OJ's theory on humor and conservatism has just been disproved.
Posted by: Chris Durnell at August 11, 2005 11:38 AM...", mumbles the filthy barfly watching the scene, as he staggers out the door.
Posted by: Raoul Ortega at August 11, 2005 1:00 PM...And the last thing he hears is Dean screaming out, "Buy a round Roberts, you cheap, lying Republican. It's not like you ever put in an honest days work in your life. Yeeeeaaauuuugghhh!"
Posted by: Patrick H at August 11, 2005 1:19 PM..humor theory admittedly weakened, but not yet disproved, I say!
Posted by: JonofAtlanta at August 11, 2005 1:34 PMThe best Clinton joke involved Bill, Pope John Paul II, and the Virgin Mary.
It's tough to make jokes about Hillary - she is just too much like Al Gore. The best jokes are the ones they do to themselves.
Posted by: ratbert at August 11, 2005 1:41 PMOk ratbert, I'll go along with it:
Bill Clinton, Pope John Paul, and the Virgin Mary walk into a bar...
Posted by: AllenS at August 11, 2005 2:10 PMWell, in Orrin's defense he says that all humor is conservative, not that all conservatives are funny.
Posted by: Governor Breck at August 11, 2005 5:35 PMThank you, Gov. Although Robert Schwartz took the cake tonight with his comment about Max Cleland and Cindy Sheehan.
Posted by: jim hamlen at August 11, 2005 10:09 PM