Sure, it sounds innocent enough, but what about the slippery slope? Start calling them by their names and pretty soon you find yourself telephoning her mother on her birthday and feeling guilty because you can't remember what she wore on your fourth anniversary. From there it's a short step to waking up in a cold sweat over toilet seats or even letting yourself get talked into peeing sitting down. Finally, one day you find yourself turning the game off to watch a chick flic with her and you realize only years of heavy duty therapy can save you.

If grunting was good enough for the (very distant) ancestors, why isn't it good enough today? Aren't they ever satisfied?

Be nice to her, or this could happen to you.

Shame on you, David. My wife just asked me to follow those rules on Valentine's Day, so I've had to cancel poker night and look up her name.

Don't panic. It'll never catch on, those Japanese names are hard to remember.

Mike: While we were dating I forgot my wife's birthday. Don got off easy.

If this isn't a gag, it's really, really sick.

erp:

Surely that was a gag itself.

Sorry that last comment was meant for the blind restaurant post.

David - She made you propose then and there, eh?