UFO commanders are well briefed by their mothership to land in Paris for the fastest surrender on the planet.

They will never stop. Never, never, never, never, never....

"I'm so concerned about what the consequences might be of starting an intergalactic war....."

And, just to play out this nut-case scenario, Hellyer KNOWS, beyond any shadow of doubt, just who would be "responsible" for starting it..

Can self-loathing possiblt be any deeper than this?

"We know now that in the early years of the twenty-first century this world was being watched closely by intelligences greater than man's, and yet as mortal as his own. We know now that as human beings busied themselves about their various concerns they were scrutinized and studied, perhaps almost as narrowly as a man with a microscope might scrutinize the transient creatures that swarm and multiply in a drop of water.

With infinite complacence people went to and fro over the earth about their little affairs, serene in the assurance of their dominion over this small, spinning fragment of solar driftwood which, by chance or design, man has inherited out of the dark mystery of Time and Space.

Yet across an immense ethereal gulf, minds that are to our minds as ours are to the beasts in the jungle, intellects vast, cool, but of course deeply sympathetic and morally superior to us, regarded this earth with innocent and peaceful eyes as we slowly and surely drew our plans to attack them..... unlaterally, of course."

Leser Pearson, from the famous radio play, 'War of Earth's Imperialist Aggression'.

Sometime we must weigh carefully whether we are being kind or cruel when we indulge the delusional, as when we talk as though the magnets on the unfortunate's refridgerator had really been put there by the CIA to monitor his brain waves.

I must confess that once I walked up to the Lyndon LaRouche table at the Post Office wearing the "NSA" sweatshirt my son gave me, and, after striking up a conversation, looked at my watch, then up at the noonday sky, then quickly scurried away.

As to Canada's Ministry of Exterrestial Affairs, out of charity I should forbear to inform them that there is only one power on Earth whith which our visitors must treat, and it is not Canada.

In Larry Niven's The Fourth Profession, the visiting aliens were travelling salesmen. They only met with the US/USSR because any country incapable of manned spaceflight was considered non-sentient.

The funniest part is he admits he has no inside information, because Canadian defence ministers are inconsequential:

"Hellyer revealed, "The secrecy involved in all matters pertaining to the Roswell incident was unparalled. The classification was, from the outset, above top secret, so the vast majority of U.S. officials and politicians, let alone a mere allied minister of defence, were never in-the-loop."

Maybe it's because, by coincidence, the red stylized maple leaf is the intergalactic symbol for surrender and defeat?

I think the real problem is that the poor guy hasn't figured out that The X Files and Stargate SG-1 aren't documentaries. (And that Red Green is.)

I hope some reporter asks Jimmy Carter what he thinks about this. Supposedly he was a big fan of Close Encounters when it came out.

Paul Hellyer ran for the leadership of the Liberal Party but lost to Trudeau in 1968. Can you imagine if he had won? He'd have been Prime Minister of Canada!

He was the Defense Minister who abolished the Canadian Navy, Army and Air Force, merging them all into the Canadian Armed Forces. Kind of explains the shape of the military today, in combination with the slashing of their budget year after year since Trudeau's rule.

Hey, we've solved global warming and built international peace and harmony. Now we're moving onwards and upwards. You should be very grateful.

Err, do you mind keeping an eye on North Korea and Iran while we're at it?

In fairness, more than one commentator has raised the delicate issue of insanity here.

The issue of Hellyer's sanity has been floating around in Canada for quite some time now, long before this latest outburst.

I checked the CTV web page - and they are not carrying this piece of news, even after I emailed them this morning to see if it was just an "oversight".

Your Honor, I rest my case. It is time to end this farce before they embarass the entire continent.

Wouldn't surprise me if he came up with this theory during some sort of U.S.-Canadian conference between Trudeau and Johnson in the 1960s, when Hellyer first came in contact with Ramsey Clark.

Is there enough Haldol in the world to treat the Ottawa municipal water system?

Does High Commander Dick Solomon have anything to say?

Mr. Hellyer went on to say, "I'm so concerned about what the consequences might be of starting an intergalactic war, that I just think I had to say something."

No worries, mate - no civilization, culture, or society on Earth is currently capable of starting an intergalactic war, nor an intragalactic war; not even an interplanetary war, not for several decades yet.

Posted by: Michael Herdegen at November 27, 2005 5:19 AM