February 22, 2005

"MY SON HAD REASONED" (via Mike Daley):

Don't apologize for abortion (Sarah Werthan Buttenwieser, 2/17/05, Philadelphia Inquirer)

My 9-year-old son overheard my friend telling me about her situation, and he was worried on her behalf. Days later, when I reported my friend's good news - everything looks healthy - to my son, he replied, "Good, then she doesn't have to have an abortion. I mean, if she'd had to have one, that would have been fine, but it's not a good thing."

In a previous conversation about our friend, my son had reasoned that "between one and four months, it's not a baby." But now he was saying he saw abortion as bad. I asked why he thought abortion might be a bad choice.

"Why would you say no to having a baby?" he countered.

I took one moment to consider whether I was going to get into this with him. I took one deep breath. Then, I told him that I have had two abortions. Of course, he wanted to know all about what happened.

As I started to describe my senior year of high school dilemma (baby or college?), he leapt in: "College."

I told him about being 20 and having had a birth control failure. I told him I wasn't at all sad about those choices because I had the family I wanted all along: a loving papa with three wonderful kids, something that would not have been possible had I become a mother before I was ready.

Reproductive freedom - abortion rights; freedom of sexual consent; motherhood - is essential to women's equality. Far from being tragic, abortion ensures us agency over our lives.

Every euphemism and every apology about abortion is really another apology for being female, as if over and over, that pesky fertility gets in our way.


So in getting away from euphemism she says abortion isn't about the child she kills but about herself? Well, she's certainly right that we need folks like her to be more honest, forthright, and unapologetic--they'll appall people.

Posted by Orrin Judd at February 22, 2005 11:04 PM
Comments

In my experience, children are horrified and appalled by the idea of abortion. The fiction that "It's not a baby," runs counter to what their senses tell them: then too, they are close to their own babyhood, and can imagine themselves being disposed of.

Posted by: Lou Gots at February 23, 2005 1:24 AM

In my experience, children are horrified and appalled by the idea of abortion. The fiction that "It's not a baby," runs counter to what their senses tell them: then too, they are close to their own babyhood, and can imagine themselves being disposed of.

Posted by: Lou Gots at February 23, 2005 1:27 AM

As a failed abortion myself I am somewhat sympathetic.

Posted by: Gideon at February 23, 2005 2:01 AM

"So just remember, Junior, I've already offed two of your older siblings 'cause their existence was inconvenient to me, but that doesn't mean I don't love you."

"Yes, Mommie Dearest."

Posted by: Mike Morley at February 23, 2005 7:01 AM

There was a Philip K Dick short story a few years back that postulated abortion being extended past birth up to the age of 10 years old. So kids lived in abject fear of the roving panel trucks that would come take them away should their parents get sick of them. For the life of me I can't remember the title, but I do recall that he took a lot of heat from the pro-abortion crowd.

Posted by: Governor Breck at February 23, 2005 7:43 AM

There was a "touching" letter To "Dear Abby" in which a pro-abortion mother magnaomously allowed her pro-life Brother to tell his side of the Abortion issue to her daughter, in the context of the Clinton/Dole race. She and her teachers had already given their side of the story to the 12 year old, so she was confident her daughter would see her side of the story.

No way. The kid started asking pointed questions, and when she got the usual arguments, totally estranged herself from her own mother. So "distraught Mother" wrote Abby for advice, who Actually counseled her to REPEAT THE SAME ARGUMENTS. As if repetition of the arguments would somehow compensate for the poverty of their moral underpinnings.

Liberals celebrate the "moral clarity" of the youth, but only when they see that the enemy Emperor has no clothes. That assessment changes mighty quick when the kids start looking strangely at THEM.

Posted by: Ptah at February 23, 2005 8:02 AM

Lou:

Not when monsters like this lady get ahold of them.

Posted by: oj at February 23, 2005 8:31 AM

When she was twenty she "had a birth control failure". Hmm. Very passive voice.

Now, maybe the condom broke or the pill didn't work, but boiled down it really means "I was irresonsible enough to screw a guy I didn't want to marry at a time I wasn't prepared to have a family, so when I got knocked up I sacrificed the baby to my own irresponsibility".

I am no a doctrinaire pro-lifer, but it just kills me that the pro-abort people can't fess up to what most of it's all really about, which is just runaday sex without consequences. NARAL ran ad campains calling a pro-abortion stance "the responsible choice", when after all so many abortions result from rank irresponsibility.

Posted by: Twn at February 23, 2005 8:58 AM

Moloch the beautiful? Shrewd marketing ploy. Run with it.

Posted by: Luciferous at February 23, 2005 11:33 AM

Lou;

Having had to explain a miscarriage to a young boy, I can't imagine trying to explain a non-medical-emergency abortion.

Posted by: Annoying Old Guy at February 23, 2005 1:19 PM

Gideon:

Whoa...say what?

Posted by: Matt Murphy at February 23, 2005 10:22 PM
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