September 21, 2017

"IF YOU CAN'T TRUST JOE DIMAGGIO...":

The Week My Husband Left And My House Was Burgled I Secured A Grant To Begin The Project That Became BRCA1 (Dr Mary-Claire King, 9/14/17, Huffington Post)

The week of April Fools' Day of 1981 began badly. That Sunday night my husband told me he was leaving me. He had fallen in love with one of his graduate students, and they were headed back to the tropics the next day.

I was completely devastated. It was totally unexpected. 33 years later, I still don't know what to say about it. I was just beside myself.

He gave me a new vacuum cleaner to soften the blow.

It was the middle of spring quarter at Berkeley, so the next morning I had my class, as usual. And I had to either teach it or explain why not. It was far easier to teach, so I dropped off our daughter, Emily - who was five and three-quarters at the time - at kindergarten, along with her faithful Aussie, her Australian shepherd, who went everywhere with her. I headed down to school and taught my class.

As I was leaving, my department chairman caught up with me. He said, "Come into my office."

I said, "Fine." (I had hoped to escape.)

I went into his office, and he said, "I wanted to tell you, I've just learned you've been awarded tenure." And of course I burst into tears.

Now, this department chairman, bless him, was a gentleman a full generation older than me. He had three grown sons. He had no daughters. He had certainly never had a young woman assistant professor in his charge before.

And he took my shoulders, and he stepped back, and he said, "No one's ever reacted like that before." He said, "Sit down, sit down. What's the matter?"

I said, "It's not the tenure. It's that my husband told me last night he was leaving me."

He looked at me, opened the drawer of his desk, pulled out a huge bottle of Jack Daniels, poured me a half a glass of it, and said, "Drink this. You'll feel better."

Posted by at September 21, 2017 6:41 AM

  

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