September 30, 2004

LIKE GEORGE HAMILTON DOING A PUMICE STONE INFOMERCIAL:

Why Bush Looks Good to Women (Margaret Carlson, September 30, 2004, LA Times)

Freud, on his deathbed, asked, "What do women want?" The improbable answer, it now seems, may be George W. Bush.

According to pollsters, the gender gap that usually helps Democrats is shrinking. The reason may be as simple as Bush himself: Post-9/11 pollsters say women prefer certitude and clarity to nuance and verbosity, staying alive to after-school programs. Democrats wail at the loss of their usual edge with women, at the irony of the National Guard slacker beating the Silver Star warrior on the issue of strength. But bluster and repetition have apparently prevailed, especially when John Kerry has said both so much and so little. Hard to read, Kerry has let Bush and his evil genius, Karl Rove — the architect of his political life — fill in the blanks.

I don't buy Bush's strength, but in a campaign it doesn't matter what is real and what is fake; it's what will fly. Tonight, Kerry has a chance to press his case with women, notoriously late deciders with a long attention span and good impulse control. Though errant female voters are gettable for Kerry, it won't be easy. There are some troublesome biographical points. Marrying one woman vastly wealthier than you are looks like good fortune in matters of the heart. Marrying a second one looks like a calculated career move. Kerry's hooded eyes make him look like a brooder, but not the strong, silent type. At a totally superficial level, that orange tan is troublesome. Across the political spectrum, women do not trust a primper.


As any good cabana boy knows, all women want the same thing: a good foot rub. Unfortunately for the Senator, there isn't time to get to every female pair of feet in America by November 2nd.

Posted by Orrin Judd at September 30, 2004 11:11 AM
Comments

Maybe Kerry's trying to pass himself off as Hulk Hogan.

Posted by: M Ali Choudhury at September 30, 2004 11:47 AM

Only if Hulk Hogan lost 90% of his muscle mass.

Articles like these, where liberals recognize through clenched teeth that Bush is beating their boy Kerry handily, are becoming more common and are evidence of the coming disillusionment of the left.

Posted by: AWW at September 30, 2004 11:50 AM

Can't help but observe that one of Kerry's problems may be that he looks like a mortician, albeit an orange one...

And then there are his 4th grade responses everytime something is said about him, kind of a nah nah nah thing... It would be funnier if it weren't so scary.

Posted by: D. L. Meadows at September 30, 2004 12:15 PM

I bet that if former President Clinton were running, that he could get to every female pair of feet. And, way before Nov. 2nd.

Posted by: John J. Coupal at September 30, 2004 1:23 PM

Margaret Carlson would be at the head of that line, for sure.

Posted by: jim hamlen at September 30, 2004 1:38 PM

Didn't you have a story a while back about some guy in New Hampshire who was giving women foot rubs (or was it licks?) in public? Maybe Kerry should hire him as an advisor. If they make it a MoveOn project with Soros money, they might be able to get it done.

Posted by: pj at September 30, 2004 3:43 PM

John -- you're right about Clinton getting to every female but wrong about the feet. His interests lie in a different part of female anatomy.

Posted by: Josh Silverman at September 30, 2004 5:32 PM
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